Bargain Breeches: Too Good to be True?

In a lifetime of bargain hunting, this was my biggest score: Elizabeth G breeches (my faves and no longer made!) at a resale shop, winter-weight fabric and real leather seat in great condition, for $10!!! OMG! There was no size marked, but Elizabeth G’s were usually customs and didn’t have a size label, so I slipped them on quickly to check the dreaded waist area. They felt great. I flung my $10 at the counter person and fled since I was late for a lesson.

The bargain breeches didn’t look too bad but were hard to walk in.

How could this be!? Maybe because it was March in Wellie World, and who would ever want winter-weight breeches in Florida? How did they end up there in the first place? I didn’t care that I wouldn’t be able to wear them for nearly a year. I just grabbed them and ran.

This week, when our remarkable Christmas gift from Mother Nature of 70-degree days gave way to more normal temps for the Carolina foothills, I dove into the back of my closet and brought those wonderful breeches up to the surface. I pulled them on, noticing for the first time that the legs were really long. Huh? Well, that could be fixed, and in the meantime I could bunch them under my socks and half chaps.

Within 10 minutes after arriving at the barn I realized I had a problem. The rise on the breeches was too short (never a problem with Elizabeth G’s, one reason I love them so much) and I had to keep pulling them up. Then it struck me: They were men’s breeches, made for a reaaalllllyy TALL man! I now understood why men need suspenders or at least a good belt. They looked okay, but off the horse I had to keep lifting them by the waist. It was really an issue when I stopped by the supermarket on the way home and ducked into the ladies room in the back by the meat section a couple times to maintain my modesty.

I am now in mourning for my “great” bargain – it’s sort of like buyer’s remorse, except the purchase was only $10 and there’s no way they can go back after nine months. It’s nothing like buyer’s remorse after buying a gorgeous 3-year-old instead of a steady Eddie plain 10-year-old. But, I expected to wear those breeches for a lifetime of winters, and I’m still a bit sad.

Anyway, there’s a resale shop near me, so the breeches can find a new home, and I’m back to wearing silk ski long underwear under my summer-weight breeches.